Archive for May, 2009
Off for a weekend of SUPing and windsurfing around Koh Samet island. We have rented a large fishing boat to take us to suitable spots. If it doesn’t rain constantly, it will be fun. If it does rain constantly, we will drink beer and complain.
See you Monday, please amuse yourselves in the meantime. Thank you.
There are some people who think that the local police do very little apart from lining their pockets with fines imposed on morons who refuse to wear crash helmets when riding a bike. Not so. The boys in brown are putting their lives on the line on a daily basis, fighting major crime across the city.
For proof, look no further than the successful conclusion to a massive sting operation that has been underway for several months against a vicious drug syndicate. The operation came to a head this week when police raided the headquarters of the syndicate and, in a hail of absolutely no gunfire, surrounded the mastermind of the operation.
Khun Meuan, an eighty year old grandmother, is now safely behind bars. Grateful residents of Pattaya will sleep easier in their beds this evening, knowing that this evil peddler of death is off the streets.
Photo from Pattaya Daily News
Another Highside day and the fragrant Khun Narin is joined by the equally fragrant Khun Cha Cha; although given that she spent most of the day firmly attached to various parts of the CEO’s anatomy, we can assume she is not available for “Ugandan discussions.”
A lack of stunts due to no Jimmy, who is absent without leave fulfilling some personal ambitions of an anatomical nature in California (i.e. getting laid. A lot).
I have previously waxed lyrical about J-Net as being a more acceptable internet provider than wanky Maxnet. And the J-Net experience has continued to be excellent,, until I came home to a red light on my router today, and a message that my authentication had failed, whatever the hell that means.
I had had this before with Maxnet and had gone through the usual we will call you back but we won’t really cycle; until the red light had finally cleared itself overnight. I shuddered at the thought of going through this nonsense again with J-Net.
I called, they answered, in English. The person I spoke to actually offered to help me and asked me to hold on to the line. Instead of then hanging up, she came back in a about a minute and asked me to restart my router. Oh dear, this was the Maxnet trick. They would tell you to turn off your router for thirty minutes and then turn it back on again, after which nothing had changed, apart from your level of despondency and desire to insert sharp objects into the nearest orifice of Maxnet support staff.
With a weary voice I explained I just turned off my router for nearly an hour and nothing had changed. “Oh no”, said my support angel, “you don’t need to do that. I have cleared the line. Just turn off the router for two minutes and then on again, your internet will be fine.”
I did, and it was. All praise J-Net.
I have had the privilege of seeing a tiger in the wild. I was in Nepal, on top of an elephant, and we had spent a couple of hours tracking a tiger from a rather bloody recent kill to a clearing where it sat in the open perusing us.
I have a photo somewhere but I don’t need it, the moment is burned in my memory. The elephants were shifting around nervously in a manner that said they would like to move somewhere else as soon as possible. The tiger just gave a look which said “If you idiots would care to come down off those elephants, I’ll be fucking having you Jimmy”, (for some inexplicable reason this tiger seemed to come from Glasgow).
It was serene and menacing, and nothing like the poor tiger I encountered at Nong Nuch this morning. Dragged out of a tiny cage, this sad creature was available for tourists to pose for photos (for a price). The keeper kept having to lift its head, clearly it had been heavily drugged to ensure it did not ravage all around it, which it would have been perfectly entitled in doing.
On a good day, I enjoy waking early and watching she who must be obeyed sleeping. She is at her best when not conscious. Sadly, this morning I was woken extra early by the unmistakable sound and smell of one of the cats vomiting on the bedsheets. Oh joy. I feigned sleep until she who must be obeyed had cleared it up, then decided to rise and head out to Nong Nuch Tropical Garden to take a few photos.
There will follow posts containing photos of flowers. You have been warned.