An ordinary life in an extra-ordinary place
Ground control to Major Spike (deceased)
I keep an eye on how people find their way here, and sometimes this leads me to interesting information.
Today I had a link from The Good Funeral Guide which picked up on the monk cremation story (said nice things, gave an extract and provided a link; that’s the way to do it. Take note you Sompost.com bastards).
I was rather intrigued by the concept of a guide to funerals and had a browse; and I am glad I did. My current plans were to have myself cremated (after death preferably) and then ask for the ashes to be scattered on the Gulf of Thailand on the grounds that:
1. I have had happy times windsurfing on the Gulf.
2. A few ashes will not make much difference to the general level of pollution.
But bugger that for a send-off. The Good Funeral Guide has some much better ideas:
* Mix them with clay or concrete and make something.
* Mix some with paint and paint something – or commission an artist.
* Fire them out of shotgun cartridges.
* Scatter them from a hot air balloon or a light aircraft.
* Scatter them at sea.
* Have them turned into a diamond.
* Have them mixed with glass and made into an ornament or pendant.
* Keep some in a locket, a ring or a pendant.
* Have them made into a firework display.
* Fire them into space.
Having them fired out of a shotgun cartridge (at the victim of my choice) has an attraction; but I think I will settle for being blasted into lunar orbit. A little bit of Spike dust glittering in the night sky; how cool would that be? Donations please.
about 2 years ago
Mention of the transgressing bastard Sompost got me wondering why you appear to have not taken any action against him.
Is it because….
a)You’ve reached an out of court settlement and are now restrained by a confidentiality agreement?…. or
b)He’s bigger than you?…. or
c)His dad’s bigger than your dad?… or
d)You can’t be arsed?
Update please.
about 2 years ago
Forget all that cremation rubbish. Just be made into cat food, once you have perambulated through your cats guts the results can be sent to compost.com. That way your cats benefit from your final remaining goodness and sompost get the crap they deserve.
about 2 years ago
genuinej, I have reported to Google Analytics who have advised me that they will look into it, but it may be a while before I hear more. I have also contacted their service provider and told him that he must stop hosting them or else I will harm him, his family, and the seven generations that follow him. I have not had the courtesy of a response.
I have discovered that if I post something, wait until Sompost have picked it up, and then delete it; it stays on Sompost. This has possibilities, but no time to explore as yet.
Guildford, moon orbit or shat out of a cat; the agony of choice!
about 2 years ago
Spike: * Scatter them from a hot air balloon or a light aircraft.
Not a good idea to scatter ashes from a light aircraft… The ashes have a tendency to blow back into the aircraft and the next thing you know, Uncle Spike’s ashes are in your hair, eyes, mouth, etc…
about 2 years ago
Sav B; are you speaking from experience?
about 2 years ago
genuinej, and there is this:
http://thailand.sompost.com/?p=411
about 2 years ago
Marvelous!!! Brought tears to my eyes. That’ll learn ‘em, eh?
about 2 years ago
They probably never read it; but it made me happy. Missed the chance to include a suitable image; rectify that next time.
about 2 years ago
Small victory on the Sompost front. They are now showing the first part of the post and then linking here, rather than taking the post onto their site; all very acceptable. Seem to be doing that for the Thailand contributors, but not for other countries where maybe they have yet to have complaints.
A shame in a way, I had another Sompost post worked up for release tomorrow and a plan to deliver a load of quick setting concrete to their service provider.