Letting it all hang out


February 7th, 2017|0 Comments

Pattaya Arts Festival

Pattaya is better known for tarts than arts, so kudos to whoever for coming up with the idea for an arts festival. The emphasis was on painting, and the emphasis on the emphasis was spray painted graffiti; but there was plenty to look at, once you had battled through the usual stalls selling assorted tat.

A side road had had walls painted white, and then graffiti artists of various nationalities were let loose:









On Beach Road there were large panels erected on which spray paint was again the main medium, but with some more traditional methods also being used:














There was a live band, food trucks, and some strange creations on the beach:


Given all the crafts practised in Thailand, it would have been good to see more variety; but it was an enjoyable stroll down the beach on a Saturday afternoon. More today if you are interested, starting from 1600.

February 5th, 2017|0 Comments

Champagne on the pitch


“The small sensor on micro four thirds cameras means it is impossible to achieve subject isolation”. Oh, do fuck off!

February 4th, 2017|1 Comment

Failed ferry


February 3rd, 2017|3 Comments

The day I pointed at something

It all started so well. A pleasant day with visiting friends and we decided to round things off with an evening meal on the beach at Bang Saray. Then on the way, this:

The high pitched scream was courtesy of she who must be obeyed who had been practising for this moment for years with assorted squeaks and warning noises whenever a perceived threat arose. This time, her wail was too late for impact to be avoided as the driver of a brand new Honda Accord (hereafter to be known as “the bitch”) decided she had every right to pull out across a busy main road.

The dust settled and my wife swung into action, phoning the insurance company and dealing with the policeman who had been standing at the junction doing not a lot; while I sat with our friends and advised them that the seafood supper might not happen.

More police arrived. A rescue van smoked to stop with flashing lights, and the weeping bitch was taken away with a bump on her head. Before leaving she asked why we had not slowed down to let her out….

Insurance representatives were next on the scene, by which time my wife had the above video on her phone; thus settling the issue of liability; but of course everything had to be photographed and measured. And then came my exciting moment!

Those familiar with this pleasant land will know that any photographed incident always includes someone pointing so there is no doubt what you are meant to be looking at. Double-decker bus in a ditch? Have a man pointing at it. Burning building? Better have someone almost on fire pointing at the flames.

And so it was I was required to stand next to the tattered remains of our truck, and point to the carnage while the insurance man took a photo. I also offered to point and what little remained of the bitch’s rear wheel and brake disk but that was not required.

Further standing around and a tow truck arrived to move the truck to the police station, and we followed behind, sitting on the rear deck of the insurance agent’s truck. On the way, a policeman drew level with us in traffic and shouted out “good thing you had a video”; presumably because without it there would be some dispute as to whether the person driving down a dual carriageway had right of way over a dumb bitch pulling out from a side road…

Time stood still at the police station as various forms were filled out. She who must be obeyed went out to forage for emergency food supplies and we waited for the bitch to turn up after her check-up at the hospital. She eventually arrived, being helped up the steps by her husband in a desperate attempt at gaining sympathy. But within a few minutes she had accepted full responsibility and we were free to go; a mere four hours after the accident.

Today we went to Mitsubishi and were told repairs would take a month.

This is the second accident with this machine since we got it. I think we need an even luckier number plate and even more amulets swinging from the rear view mirror.

February 2nd, 2017|12 Comments

Master of all he surveys


January 28th, 2017|1 Comment

Line of duty

She who must be obeyed has many hobbies, one of which is perusing eBay listings in pursuit of bargains. So the postman is a regular visitor to our door, and I feel obliged to give him a healthy tip every new year to keep him smiling, and delivering.

Sometimes, instead of a parcel, a little green slip arrives instructing my wife to attend the nearest post office where her ordered box of wonderfulness will be handed over upon payment of duty. These green slips are not popular.

This week such a slip arrived; but no duty payable was mentioned, and instead of going to the post office, the parcel was being held at Laem Chabang port, an traffic congested 30 kilometres away. Joy.

My wife consulted her logistics schedule and decided that nothing was due to arrive via boat; although as this item had come from America it could have been sent several months ago. It was a mystery that could only be solved by heading for the customs office at the port, so we went.

On the way, with my wife driving, I perused the news on my phone and recounted the story to her of the British millionaire who was murdered after one year of marriage to a Ukrainian woman, who then sold his possessions and emptied his bank accounts before disappearing. “Don’t worry”, my wife reassured me, “we have been together 13 years; if I was going to do it to you I would have done it by now!”

At the customs office we headed upstairs and along a corridor to a large open plan area which didn’t seem designed for regular visits by members of the public. The green slip was presented and my beloved was led away, would I ever see her again? After a while she returned with her parcel and the customs officer announced that she was “free to go”, which is not something you hear in a shopping mall when completing a purchase.

Back outside, the story was recounted. At the airport in Bangkok they randomly check parcels with a low declared value for customs. If the contents appears to be worth much more than the declared value, the parcel is sent to the nearest customs office and the recipient must attend and prove the declared value is accurate. If they fail to do so they are locked up for fifteen years (I assume). In she who must be obeyed’s parcel there was a dress, and on the dress was a price tag of $165; but the declared value was $8; hence the query. Fortunately she was able to bring up eBay on her phone and prove that she had indeed paid $8 for the dress; so escaped incarceration.

Back home after a two hour trip, and she has yet to make an appearance wearing the new dress. Like so many things that she orders from eBay, I assume it doesn’t fit.

January 27th, 2017|1 Comment

Synchronised Staring


January 26th, 2017|0 Comments


When the features of my new toy were announced, I found it difficult to imagine the circumstances in which I might find 60 frames a second useful, with focus only being taken on the first frame.

But after the initial, inevitable balloon pop…


… there have been other occasions when it has come in really useful, most recently for the bouquet toss at the wedding.


Having not taken any photos for a couple of days, I headed for the garden yesterday and blasted some buzzing insects (the Latin names escape me). Crap light, but some were quite fun.





January 25th, 2017|1 Comment

Variable exchange rates

Rick@Knees has been more excited than usual this week with the announcement of the new Leica M10. He has been itching to divest a large sum of cash on gadgets, and now is his chance to obtain a camera that does nothing very well, but looks beautiful and handles like a dream; until it breaks down and has to be sent back to Germany for five months.

Anyway, I was telling she who must be obeyed about it and mentioned that the price was around 250,00 baht. I was about to explain her how that amount could buy me an even more extensive lens collection; but she had already made her own conversion.

“My God! That’s enough to buy two Prada handbags”.

Women have no sense of worth.

January 24th, 2017|3 Comments